"Sex without consent, I suppose that is rape"

A really fascinating read from the Office of the Children’s Commissioner, one of the research contributors being the fabulous Professor Liz Kelly of the Child and Woman Abuse Studies Unit. It is so useful to have it down in black and white the views of our own youngsters in relation to sexual consent. Some stand out points for me were:

  • Getting sex from a girl = man points for a boy
  • Having sex as a girl still pretty much makes you a slut
  • The onus for giving consent is on the girl rather than any responsibility for making sure to get consent being on the boy

Therefore,

  • Pressuring girls into sex is seen as both normal and expected
  • The implication is that sex is essentially for boys: where is the notion of acceptable female sexual pleasure?
  • Consent is more of a theoretical concept than a communication between two people in reality

I’m hoping to include a few aspects of this important report in the resource pack I am preparing for a school training day I am organising, that I am very excited to say will involve expert facilitators from The Durham and Darlington Rape and Sexual Abuse Counselling Centre, Wear Valley Women’s Aid, LGBT North East at DISC, Relate North EastBarnardo’s SECOS team and Durham Police.